Anyone who spends any amount of time in a leadership role will have to deal with difficult people. It may be difficult teachers, difficult co-workers, or even difficult parents. Learning how to effectively communicate and manage these people can be a huge undertaking.
Dr. John C. Maxwell has written several books pertaining to leadership. Dr. Maxwell is also an international speaker who has trained more than one million leaders worldwide.
I began reading one of his books, co-authored with Dr. Les Parrot, entitled 25 Ways to Win with People. I discovered this book one evening and began following him on twitter here: http://johnmaxwellonleadership.com/2012/04/23/enlarging-others/
The suggestions made in his book were so helpful to me, as an administrator, I decided my teachers could benefit from them as well. I decided to begin sharing these suggestions with them in the weekly memo they receive from administration.
The following are some of the suggestions shared with teachers:
“Keys to Unlocking Conflict: Build a rapport: Re-instill the human touch by connecting with your colleagues on a personal level. Go out with them for lunches or dinners. Get to know them as people, and not colleagues. Learn more about their hobbies, their family, and their lives. Foster strong connections and this will go a long way in your work environment!”
“Keys to Unlocking Conflict: Understand the person’s intentions: I’d like to believe that no one is difficult for the sake of being difficult. Even when it may seem that the person is just out to get you, there is always some underlying reason that is motivating them to act this way. Rarely is this motivation apparent. Try to identify the person’s trigger: What is making him/her act in this manner? What is stopping him/her from cooperating with you? How can you help to meet his/her needs and resolve the situation?”
“Keys to Unlocking Conflict: Let the person know where you are coming from: Always let people know your intentions behind what you are doing. Sometimes, they are resistant because they think that you are just being difficult with them. Letting them in on the reason behind your actions and the full background of what is happening will enable them to empathize with your situation. This helps them to get on-board much easier.”
These “Keys to Unlocking Conflict” started appearing in the weekly memo during the second semester of the 2011-2012 school year. Parent conferences were being scheduled at this time and I felt these suggestions may help these meetings to remain positive as well as effective.
I really like these "keys" and John Maxwell as well. What kind of feedback have you gotten from your staff, Stevi? I think the second key can be very beneficial with parents. Sometimes it seems as though parents are being so difficult when, in reality, they simply want to advocate for their children and may not know the most effective way of doing so.
ReplyDeleteStevi,
ReplyDeleteI like your idea of sending these "Keys to Unlocking Conflict" tips to your teachers. As you stated, educators may encounter conflict with parents and students, and how teachers deal with these conflicts are important for success. It is surprising that during my education to become an educator, I don't remember ever having anyone talk to me or teach me how to handle a parent conference. These tips would be especially important for new teachers.